Trail Etiquette

This afternoon Jeff and I are again climbing Poo Poo Point with our packs in continuing our training for Mount St. Helens and the Wonderland Trail. This is the last time for a few weeks that we will be climbing that point though.

The reason, May is here. And with May our eyes shift to Mount Si above North Bend, Washington. But I'll talk more about that later.

Today I'm going to talk about trail etiquette.

• Pants: no hiking naked. Period.

• Know the love-triangle: By love triangle I'm not talking about an actual love affair, but rather hikers, bikes and horses. Bikers rank at the bottom. They yield to both hikers and horses. Hikers yield to horses. And horses, well horses are large creatures. They don't yield.

• ALWAYS stay on the trial: Never cut off switchbacks or blaze your own shortcuts.

• Act like the road: On wider trails keep to the right when others approach, and when passing other hikers, do so on the left.

• Let others know you're there: If you are approaching behind another hiker, let them know you are going to pass. Most likely they will step to the side to make it easier for you.

• Obey heartbeat rules: Heartbeats work like this - A 12 heartbeat section of trail means that along that part of trail, only 12 heartbeats are allowed. A heartbeat is, well, anything with a heart. People, horses, dogs, mules, etc. So 11 people and dog is 12. So is 3 people, 4 dogs, 2 cows, 2 llamas and a goat.

• Hikers going up hill have the call: Now this rule varies based the individual on the trail, but in most cases the up hill hiker will yield to the down hill one. This is for two reasons, the down hill hiker has gravity and it's harder to stop, and two, it gives the up hill hiker a quick break. But if the up hill hiker keeps going, just step off the path. It's really their call.

• Hike single file: A lot of trails require you be single file anyway, but on wider trails, just because you have a large group doesn't mean you need to take up the whole trail with your large group.

• Leave No Trace: Very simple. Make sure the area you are looks the same (or better) than when you found it. This lets everyone enjoy the area. Don't cut your initials into trees. Don't litter everywhere. Don't pull up the brush. Basically, don't be dumb.

• Pack it in, pack it out: As I stated above, don't litter. It's simple. If you brought something on the hike, bring it back out.
  

• Step to the side: When you're taking a break in a crowded area, don't do so on the trail. Step to the side so others can pass.

• Leave technology at home: It's called getting outside. Instead of the iPod, listen to the birds and nature. It's the best soundtrack around.

And most importantly, have fun. It's great to be outdoors enjoying nature. If you're lucky enough to do so, look around and appreciate the beauty of the area you're in. Many people never leave the comfort of their own homes. A television doesn't do a real sunset justice.

Let it all hang out

Outdoor sports can sometimes be taken to the extreme. Whether it be the off-road unicyclist, the dirt track skate boarder or the naked hiker in the back country. Eventually every sport that is done under the sun will....wait...did you just say "naked hiker?"

Why yes I did. And since we're on the topic allow me to explain. Mountain hikers in the Swiss canton of Appenzell-Innerrhoden will now be fined 200 Swiss francs, or $170, if they are caught wandering through the Fields of Music in the buff.

Apparently this is becoming a huge, growing (no pun intended) problem in the area. Yes, naked hiking.

I found it hard to believe. I mean, try wandering nude around here in the mountains and your family jewels would be covered in mosquito bites faster than you could pull your pants back up. Although if I'm ever in that area, with an extra $170, I might have to give it a go.

It seems a lot of people do. I found tons of blogs talking about how "invigorating" and "natural" and even "free" it felt.

I do a lot of camping, backpacking and kayaking. And I must say, if I ever ran into someone backpacking in the middle of the woods stark naked, I would be surprised.


Speaking of being surprised, a woman in Salt Lake City stopped a criminal by giving him a headlock and a wedgie. No joke.

Yvonne Morris, a technician at the Brickyard Animal Hospital, said she chased a man who broke into a co-worker's car, but he kept squirming away from her.

She finally caught him, grabbed onto his boxers and gave them a yank. See kids, that is why you don't wear those stupid pants that let your underwear hangout. You'll get caught by them.


And since we're on the topic of underwear, the city of Philadelphia may want some to cover their butthead move.

From March 6 through the 15, the city will be hosting the Philly Beer Week. This is a festival which celebrates local breweries and taverns.

To help prevent drinking and driving, the City Transit System decided to sell discount passes for those attending the event. The passes were printed up and being looked over when it finally dawned on someone the problem.

Instead of a skyline of part of Philadelphia (the city hosting the event) the passes show part of the New York City skyline. Nice work people.

Anyway it goes, that's it. Case Closed.